We all enter negative mindsets, (guilt, shame, defeatism…) from time to time. I know I do. It’s common, human and in very small doses serves a purpose- introspection, higher gratitude, clarification. Like yin and yang, black and white, up and down, positive mindsets would not exist without their relative opposing negative counterparts.
“…Difficult and easy give rise to the same concept; Long and short are derived by comparison; High differs from low only by position; Sound and echo blend into one harmony; Front and back follow one another sequentially.” — Lao Zi
The real trouble begins when we become trapped in negative mindsets, thus stunting our growth and blocking our ways forward and upward. With that in mind, the other night a thought came to me: Active-Proactive, Release.
What do I mean by Active-Proactive, Release? Together these 3 words refer to a positive mindset model involving thought scripts, (stories we are told, tell ourselves and come to believe. Which in turn guide our actions and emotions). Negative mindsets (expressed internally and externally), are thought scripts with disempowering, preventative language. This is where the “can’ts”, “musts”, “need to’s”, “have to’s”, “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” and all their fixed counterparts creep in and can take root.
By replacing resisting language that is present in negative mindsets with healthy active desires, proactive action and releasing/reclaiming language, we mindfully rewrite our own inner thought scripts and life stories with ones that are loving, supportive and fruitful.
For Example, you bite your nails and wish to stop. Often times we would say/think things like:
“I really need to stop biting my nails, it’s a nasty habit!”
– OR –
“I should break myself out of the bad habit of biting my nails.”
An Active-Proactive, Release Thought Script version of this same scenario might sound more like:
“I love my body (active desire) and will care for (proactive action) my hands by no longer (release) biting my nails.”
Through using this model we’ve removed resisting, preventative and negative fixed language from our personal commitments, thoughts and beliefs.
What does it sound like out loud and in your head when using the Active-Proactive, Release approach? What does it feel like? Encouraging, motivating, uplifting…? Active-Proactive, Release isn’t a magical cure-all. As part of overall well-being and growth awareness, it takes time, self love, practice and even occasional refreshers. But, it works and you are definitely worth it!
Embrace your new truth! 🙂
The Process of Life blog posts are inspired lessons, learnings and meditations acquired for myself and my fellow growth journeyers- Coach Melanie